.Editor's Keep in mind: The complying with is the message of a letter from Exploration 3 Commander Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reflecting on the events of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed quite regarding specifics of this objective throughout the month I have actually been here, generally for two causes: the first being actually that there has been actually incredibly little opportunity to accomplish that type of writing, and furthermore, considering that I am actually not sure just how comfortable I am actually discussing notions I show to friends and family along with the remainder of the world.Effectively, definitely the globe altered today. What I claim or perform is actually incredibly minor reviewed to the significance of what happened to our nation today when it was actually attacked by ... by whom? Revolutionaries is all we know, I guess. Tough to know at whom to point our rage and concern ...I had just finished an amount of tasks this morning, the best taxing being the physical examinations of all workers participants. In a personal chat complying with that, the trip cosmetic surgeon told me they were actually possessing a really poor day on the ground. I had no concept ...He described the scenario to me as best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was thrown for a loop, after that alarmed. My initial thought and feelings was actually that this had not been a genuine talk, that I was actually still paying attention to some of my Tom Clancy strips. It only didn't seem to be feasible on this scale in our country. I couldn't even imagine the details, even just before the information of more devastation began being available in.Vladimir came by rather swiftly, picking up that something incredibly serious was actually being actually reviewed. I swung Michael right into the module at the same time. They were actually likewise surprised and also stunned. After our experts signed off, I attempted to detail to Vladimir as well as Michael as greatest I might the potential immensity of this show of terror in downtown New york and also at the Government. They clearly recognized and also were actually really compassionate.I glanced at the Globe Map on the pc to view where over the globe our experts were actually and saw that our experts were actually happening southeast away from Canada and also would be actually overlooking New England in a few moments. I whized around the terminal till I discovered a home window that would certainly provide me a view of NYC and got hold of the closest camera. It occurred to become a camera, and I was actually looking south from the home window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke seemed to have an odd blossom to it at the bottom of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the metropolitan area. After reviewing one of the newspaper article our team merely obtained, I think our team were actually taking a look at NY around the amount of time of, or even soon after, the collapse of the second tower. Exactly how unpleasant ...I scanned the electronic camera all along the East Coastline to the south to view if I could possibly observe any other smoke around Washington, or anywhere else, but absolutely nothing was visible.It was actually quite difficult to think of job after that, though our team possessed some to perform, but on the following track our experts traversed the United States more southern. All 3 people were actually functioning a couple of video cameras to attempt to receive perspectives of Nyc or Washington. There was actually haze over Washington, yet no specific resource may be found. It all appeared amazing coming from 2 to 3 hundred miles away. I can not picture the awful scenes on the ground.Aside from the psychological influence of our nation being tackled and lots of our citizens and possibly some good friends being eliminated, the absolute most difficult emotion being actually where I am actually is just one of isolation.Next day ... I suppose the tiredness as well as emotional tension received the most ideal of me. I could not keep awake as well as remain to write. Today was actually still tough, however our team started obtaining additional info, plus our experts possessed the honor of talking straight along with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, that assured us that the ground teams would remain to operate and also ensure our security, as well as the secure procedure of the Station. Our company additionally spoke with our Supervisor, Mr. Goldin, that incorporated that the companions in the Plan are all totally devoted to proceeding risk-free procedures and also support. These were certainly never inquiries for me. I know all these individuals! The ground groups have been astonishingly encouraging, extremely understanding of the impact of the updates, and have made an effort to become as beneficial as feasible. They have all been actually extremely specialist and also centered though I can not envision the disturbance of the type of news coming in and also the thought that authorities properties may be vulnerable. They never ever skipped a beat, even when moving nerve center. And also a group of senior staffs and also close friends offered our team a quite detailed rundown on what was actually recognized and also what was being performed in the authorities as well as at NASA on Tuesday afternoon, which was very useful as well as kind of all of them to do in the middle of all the turmoil. The Russian TsUP has likewise been actually supportive as well as valuable, trying to uplink newspaper article when our very own properties were actually unusable, as well as pointing out kind words ...My crewmates have actually been actually excellent, as well. They understand it is actually been actually a difficult time for me as well as the people on the ground, and also they have actually tried to be as also keeled as well as valuable as possible. Michael even repaired me my favorite Borscht soup for dinner. As well as they give me a lot of space to assume when I required it. They are really supportive and also of course shocked at whoever would perform this.I understand plenty of folks in Washington, a lot of folks that take a trip to DC as well as NYC, so many who are actually captains, that I experienced certain I would get at least a few items of bad news over the upcoming handful of days. I acquired the first one today when I learned that the Leader of the American Airlines plane that attacked the Pentagon was Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I encountered Chic during the course of plebe summer months when our company remained in the D&B with each other, as well as our team possessed lots of training class with each other. I can not picture what he must of looked at, and currently I hear that he may possess risen even further than our team can easily also think of through potentially preventing his airplane coming from being actually the one to attack the White Property. What a horrible reduction, but I make sure Chic was battling bravely to the end. And rips do not flow the exact same in space ...It is actually challenging to define exactly how it feels to be the only American fully off the planet at a time like this. The emotion that I ought to exist along with every one of you, managing this, assisting in some way, is frustrating. I recognize that our company perform the limit (or beyond) of a dreadful change in the background of the world. Numerous points will never ever coincide once again after September 11, 2001. Not just for the 1000s and countless individuals straight influenced by these horrendous acts of violence, however perhaps for all of us. Our team will discover our own selves feeling in a different way about lots of things, consisting of most likely room expedition, unfortunately.It's unpleasant to find smoke cigarettes putting from wounds in your personal nation coming from such a fantastic angle. The dichotomy of being on a spacecraft devoted to enhancing everyday life on the earth and also seeing lifestyle being damaged by such unforced, dreadful acts is jolting to the psyche, despite who you are actually. And the expertise that every thing will be actually various than when our team introduced by the opportunity our team land is a little disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation and in our leadership that our experts will definitely perform every little thing possible to better protect her as well as our families, as well as to bring fair treatment of what has been actually performed. I possess peace of mind that the great people at NASA will perform every little thing required to proceed our mission properly and also return our team safely at the correct time. As well as I overlook each one of you very much. I can not exist along with you face to face, and our team have a long way to head to complete our purpose, however be specific that my center is actually with you, and recognize you reside in my prayers.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the last character ... The good news is, it's been actually an occupied full week up here. As well as to verify that, like our nation, our experts are continuing our desired pathway with service customarily (as much as possible). Tonight the most up to date addition to the station, the Russian Docking Compartment will definitely be actually launched from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday night (United States opportunity), it is going to dock with our team, at a port certainly never used before on the nadir edge of the Service Component. This new component is going to offer our team another place to dock a Progress or even Soyuz and will certainly provide a big airlock with pair of useable hatches for administering EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which our experts will certainly carry out a few of prior to our team come home.The problem just before in taking care of today was insufficient updates. The problem right now is way too much. It came at one time when e-mail was repaired, as well as there's not nearly enough time to read all of it! Plus it is actually too difficult to manage all of it at once. However I cherish obtaining it, and I truly enjoy the terrific characters of assistance and relationship I am actually receiving.We are succeeding aboard, obtaining our work performed, and also speaking about factors. Final evening our team possessed a lengthy dialogue over dinner concerning the value of these events, the possible actions to follow, and also what need to be done. After supper, Michael resolved informing me that every email he acquired from pals in Russia pointed out exclusively to tell me just how regretful they were actually that this happened, stretching their condolences, and also asking exactly how I was actually carrying out. Vladimir instructed me the Russian phrase for "acknowledgements" after talking to the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Star City. (Both the Russian as well as the English terms are actually much extremely long to verbalize conveniently.) Incredibly types people.For the final pair of times, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to transmit live broadcasts of broadcast updates about the occasion and connected stories, to make sure I was well informed. Every expert that has come on free throw line to explain a technique or even a problem has at some factor prolonged hellos to me with kind phrases. Tonight the Russian capcom told us that as a result of the wedding day of remembrance in the United States, all day individuals had been actually bringing flowers and edging all the walls of the United States consular office in Moscow, and this night they were igniting candles in the road outside the consulate. How the planet has modified.Folks everywhere seem to recognize the senselessness and also scary in this particular assault. And the tremendous reduction. Moscow has actually dealt with these kind of concerns in the final few years along with home and also train battles, so they are actually as restless to remove this hazard as our team are actually. But all-time low line is that there are actually good individuals almost everywhere who desire to stay in tranquility. I review that a kid inquired, "America is therefore really good to other countries, our team constantly assist every person, just how can they loathe our company so much?".I hope the instance of teamwork as well as leave that this spacecraft and all people in the course illustrate daily are going to at some point encourage the rest of the world to function similarly. They must!Unfortunately, we will not be piloting over the US while folks are igniting candlesticks. Do not know if our team could possibly view that anyhow. We carried out, however, observe a really unusual and beautiful view a couple of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Area on a Soyuz enhancer. Our company were eclipsing it and also it appeared regarding 3 mins after its launch from Baikonur as the sunlight attacked our station, so it was still unaware. It seemed like a sizable comet with a directly, vast tail silhouetted versus the dark earth under. In spite of some negative lights for a while as the sunshine attacked our home window at a low angle, I handled some video clip of it as initially our company passed the spacecraft, and then enjoyed it start to mesmerize as it gained elevation and also velocity. I shot till principal engine deadline and booster separation took place just like our team came close to sunup on the Himalayas. An extraordinary sight in an unforgettable full week ...Life goes on, also precede. Our team're listed below to stay ... Frank.